I grew up in a Christian home and heard many missionaries speak at my church over the years.  At the time I thought, “Wow.” That’s neat.  God please never send me there!”  I even specifically prayed, “Lord, please don’t ever send me to Africa.”  In retrospect, I feel bad about that prayer.  How dare I limit God’s plans for my life?  

My life changed when I heard Sabet and Suzy speak at my church in June 2008.  Before they spoke, my pastor told the congregation that our church would be sending a team the following year to Sudan and asked us to pray about if God was calling us to go.  I thought “yeah right.  No way.”  Apparently God had different plans for me because I heard very clearly as they spoke “Go.”  I was shocked by this because it was never something I wanted to do.  I was scared of bugs, snakes, international travel, guns and everything else about Sudan.  After two days of fasting and prayer, God gave me confirmation through Scripture, songs and other Christians so I told my pastor I was in. 

The following February, nine of us from Rancho del Rey headed to Sudan.  When I first arrived, I was overwhelmed and experienced severe culture shock.  I thought “God, what have I done?  How am I going to make it through?  Get me out of here.”  However, God was faithful and by the time we left, I wasn’t ready to go.  Leaving felt wrong.  There was so much more to do and we only experienced a blip of what was going on.  As we flew away, I asked “God… could you possibly be calling me to return?” 

 Since this was so far from “my plan” for my life, I questioned whether this was really a calling or just a post missions trip high.  I made a list of all the reasons I wouldn’t go back and told God “here is why I can’t go. If you want me there, I am laying these at your feet to take care of.  If I am to be there, you will work these issues out.”  After returning home, God gave me clear confirmation I was supposed to be back in Sudan.  He especially used Psalm 139 to speak through me.  That scripture would pop up through others in ways that could only be from God.  He also gave me a peace about the issues I brought before Him.  They no longer stood in the way of me going to Sudan.

In late October 2009, I headed back to Sudan along with another team from Rancho del Rey.  Being back felt right.  Since I had been there before, I didn’t experience the culture shock I had the first time.  I was eager to jump in and get started helping in anyway I could.  Since I didn’t come here with a specific skill, I am available to help Sabet and Suzy with whatever they need.  Some of the areas I have helped in are: triage and registration, administration and cooking.

I love being here.  I love what In Deed and Truth Ministries does here.  I can’t imagine Sabet and Suzy not being in Tonj.  There would be a huge hole in Tonj if they weren’t here.  Their work here is important and is winning lives over to Jesus.  Many lives have been saved as a result of the clinic and the pastors school is ensuring the Gospel is being spread in South Sudan.

I have learned a lot while I have been here.  First, God has big plans for our lives if we just obey Him.  I never would have imagined I would be here doing what I am doing.  God has stretched me and given me the strength to accomplish tasks way out of my comfort zone.  Not, that I am doing anything grand, but God can be glorified when we obey Him even in the smallest ways. Two, supporting missionaries is vital.  Living conditions in Sudan are harsh.  They are isolated and far from resources. They need our prayers, encouragement and financial support to continue this work.  Three, flexibility is important and necessary.  Life here has kept me on my toes.  Each day is different and I have to be open to whatever the Lord wants me to do.  My type A personality has been jolted and I am learning to be ok with veering from my task list for the day.  God will equip me for what I need to do.  Fourth, our God is sovereign and knows our needs.  There have been times when I thought, “how, God, will this be done?”  But, he is way ahead of me and provides every time.

There have been so many special and meaningful experiences I have been a part of so far.  They are too numerous to count, but here are some highlights:

• Hearing people shout “Yar” (my Dinka name) when I got off the plane in October.
• Praying with Mary as she had no place to live and then rejoicing with her the next day when God provided a new place.
• Visiting Elizabeth’s house and praying she would get pregnant.  Now she is due in five months.
• Learning Dinka songs and laughing with Mabior as he helped me in the kitchen when I was having a bad day.
• Watching Mabior counsel Mary with his Bible
• Hearing Matoch laugh for the first time since medically evacuating him to Nairobi
• Praying for and assisting the doctors with a man with multiple gunshot wounds.
• Cheering on Dorothy has she delivered Hannah.
• Helping Suzy with administrative duties. I’m a nerd… I enjoy it!
• Enjoying a relaxing picnic with the Kuj family and compound staff under the “picnic tree.”
• Having a special extended prayer service at church after local insecurity
• Wednesday night prayer meetings
• Christmas Day with my Tonj family

I don’t know what God has in store for my future, but I am open to whatever that is.  I know that I am supposed to be in Sudan now and am honored to serve Him here with In Deed and Truth Ministries.

Bible Verse: “May your ways be known throughout the earth.  Your saving power among people everywhere.”